Since Blogger Jen over at Diagnosis Urine thinks I have it all together (and she is sorely mistaken, by the way, as proven by yesterday's blog entry) I realized I must not be vulnerable enough here at Ventalicious. Being an anonymous blog (yea right!) I can let it all hang out here, right?
I struggle with being on time. I'd like to blame this on my 3 children. Unfortunately, I was born 3 weeks late and I've been running late ever since, nothing has changed. I've grown a little in this area. Now I'm not as late as I used to be but I'm still running a good 5 minutes behind the rest of the world. Dang it. Try as I might, I'm late. At least I have 3 little ones on whom I can blame by iniquity.
I've learned a few tricks of the trade that have cut down on those rushed mornings. I blush as I reflect on what I've resorted to, just to be on time. Being a Thursday morning, we were in a huge rush. Wednesday nights are late for us. The kids weren't asleep til 10PM and BSF starts at 9:10AM on Thursdays mornings. I woke up before the kids this morning (miracle of miracles in itself) and threw a few frozen waffles in the toaster. I then woke up the troops, throwing clothes their way while rushing into the bathroom to ready myself.
Realizing that Little Dude has the ability to dress himself (IF WE HAD A MILLION YEARS) I decided it was necessary to call him into MY bathroom. Horror of horrors. Just 2 minutes alone to do my business and brush my teeth...it's all I ask. But no, while attempting to enjoy my few minutes alone, Little Dude crawls up on my lap for me to put on his socks. Why didn't anyone tell me this was motherhood? Seriously? Not even 5 minutes to myself? Am I really asking for too much?
Would a man EVER in a MILLION years allow that? My husband is VERY giving and incredibly unselfish but he would never dream of allowing a little person anywhere near his THRONE while he's on it. Do I have it in me to lock the door while I'm in the bathroom? And if I did, would we ever have ANY hope of being anywhere on time? I'm all for multi-tasking but I'm seriously taking it too far. How many things can one person do in the restroom? I think I've hit the limit. You don't even want to know what else I do in the interest of time. Blogger Jen, if I keep reading your blog maybe I'll become more transparent. You're a good influence but you might not want to know my antics. Before I know it I'll be Kramer from Seinfeld. All I need is a garbage disposal in my shower.