Mother of the Year Award Goes to...

Not me.  Not by a long shot. These kids have been in rare form all week and with my patience dwindling with each passing pound, they are on thin ice. 

After a new bottle of extra virgin olive oil got spilled (and broken) all over my travertine kitchen floor and Pillow Pets were cut/shred into pieces all over my lower level (all happened yesterday...the kids were down in the lower level while I was cleaning up the glass from the olive oil.  Guess they got bored b/c they went to town)
There was also a total fit thrown at VBS 2 nights ago by an unnamed 6 year old.  Really, haven't we outgrown this already? 

Today within seconds Boy Wondertwin spilled an entire glass of iced tea all over my wool rug and Girl Wondertwin was caught doing flips on my couch.  That was it.  I went to GWT's bedroom and emptied the contents of her shelf organizer.  Within seconds there were 8 million toys all over her bedroom floor.  She was in shock.  Next I went to Boy Wondertwin's room and followed suit, choosing the toy box to empty everywhere.  He screamed, cried, kicked and had a conniption.

I'm not proud of myself but I'm REALLY sick of cleaning up their (unnecessary) messes constantly.  It's all I do.  I put up with their fits and clean their messes.  I understand that it comes with the territory but really.  They are 6.  Isn't it time to grow up just a little?  Learn a little personal responsibility?

Wonder of Wonders.  Little Dude has been a total angel since the twins started their madness.

Bite Your Tongue

As unique and individual as people are, they can really be grouped into types. I feel like I'm okay with people. For the most part I can talk to just about anybody and hold my own in most situations. There is a certain personality type with whom I struggle. It's the type with whom it's wise to just nod, smile, agree and move on with your day. You know the type I mean.

Yea, I'm not good at that smiling, nodding and agreeing thing. Take today for example. I have a weekly interaction with a woman who likes to uh...let's just say take me under her wing. She suggests certain activities for me, gives me unheeded advice and thinks she's way beyond me in the ways of this world.

Most peace loving people would let it slide. Yep, I don't know how. Today for example, she told me that I needed to check out this particular seminar. Dumb me. I told her that I already had experience with that particular topic and was not interested. Why couldn't I just smile, nod and thank her for her advice? Because I don't know how.

Anyway, she didn't take it well and continued to lecture me on how I needed to be better informed concerning this topic. What's wrong with me? Why do I have to make waves? I can't just keep the peace?

How is it possible to keep the peace and not be fake? IS it possible? I hate fake.

Yucky, Smelly Messes

So I can't believe that I'm sharing this on a post but we're all close, personal friends, right? Just a tight little circle. So here it goes.

Little Dude created the BIGGEST mess ever today. I woke up this morning to a smell that is easily identified by any mom. The scent of feces was permeating every nook and cranny of our home and I was ready to puke.

After utilizing my best sleuth skills, I found the culprit. Little Dude had defecated in a pink Transformers costume while sleeping. Who poops in their sleep? (Or, what male sleeps in a pink transformer outfit?)

Apparently that's nothing for a 3 year old. He must have woken up in the midst of the action because then, according to my best detective skills, he must have ripped off the pink suit and dragged it down his legs (in the middle of the night, might I add), stepped all over it, and then slid it down the hallway, down the stairs and to the laundry room. How do I know this? He left a trail and ICK! Was it nasty!

When I woke him up this morning I found his legs AND feet covered in DRIED poop. I threw him in the tub while I scrubbed his room, the hallway and laundry room. Needless to say we were VERY late to Bible Study this morning.

I felt the need to blog about this for 2 reasons. One, I knew you could relate. Two, I want it chronicled so I can look back at this post the next time I'm the least bit tempted to have another baby.

Little Dude has been potty trained for over a year now and we have been downright spoiled. It's just once in a great while that an incident like the above happens. When it does though, he succeeds with flying colors. Nasty.

No worries, though. I've anti-bacterialed (that's a verb, right?) every square inch of our house and I think that disgusting smell is gone...I think. Or maybe I'm just so used to it that I don't recognize it anymore. Sad.

He's a Rare One!

So my Little Dude, age 3 and quite good at it, might I add, has been in a lot of trouble lately. His favorite thing is to tell me NO...at the top of his lungs. He's also said a few other things that get him in mega trouble. Out of desperation, I called my friend who now has 5 (including a set of twins so she knows it all, right?) and told her my predicament. She suggested vinegar.

Desperate to try anything I waited for my next opportunity for Little Dude to mouth off. Of course it wasn't a long wait. I can't remember what he said but I got a napkin and soaked it in vinegar. I then placed it on his tongue. He was not a happy camper but almost 48 hours passed before he said something inappropriate. Notice I didn't say 2 days passed before he got in trouble!

Anyway, he's gotten the vinegar treatment 3 or 4 times in the past 10 days. Today he screamed no at me and I promptly got the vinegar out. He fought me as I opened his mouth and inserted the vinegar soaked cloth. To my surprise, he stopped crying and asked for more vinegar. More? This child is a rare one, I tell you.

Now I'm off to buy hot sauce.